5 benefits of not being the "top" student

For all of my life I have had to work hard for my grades. School has felt like a battlefield. I am constantly fighting to stay on top of things. I work hard and I don't always see the results that I would like. I also have friends and acquaintances that don't have to work nearly as hard. School came naturally to them and they seemed to always do better than me and to spend half the time that I spent working on it. I used to be frustrated by this, but just recently as I was pondering on this topic, I realized that there have been some major benefits from not being the "top" student.  

1. I know how to learn. Because I have had to work hard for nearly every good grade that I got it wasn't a shock to come to college and actually have to work hard at learning. Yes, I did have some ridiculously easy classes in high school, but the honors and AP classes I took were hard for me. I had to spend hours studying to get the concepts down. It wasn't hard for me to transition into college life that requires a lot more studying than most are used to. This also kept me from getting that awful freshman GPA that everyone talks about. 
2. I'm okay with asking for help. I've noticed that because I had accepted the fact that I need help, it doesn't bother me, or hurt my pride to go talk to the professor or TA and get the help that I need. This has been a huge blessing as I have gone throughout my schooling. I have been able to make connections and really learn things. Not just memorize them for a test, but I have learned how to make the knowledge become apart of me and apply it into my life. I have talked with a lot of people that have never been into a TA lab in their life... totally a foreign concept to me. I live in those labs. This also translates into other aspects of my life. I have found that it has helped me learn to ask for help when I need it in more things than just school and many people don't know how to do that because they have never had to. 
3. It's brought me greater perspective. So often school is all about our grades. I have had many instances where I have studied and mastered a topic, but because tests are hard for me I have still done poorly. You may think that I really didn't have it mastered, but in one instance I was literally teaching the whole lab and then still did worse than most there. Testing is just not my thing. This has forced me to remember what I believe knowledge is for. Knowledge is one of the few things that we can take with us after we die, but it's so much more. It's something that gives us depth and understanding of the world. Knowledge gives us the ability to add to a conversation intelligently. Knowledge is what helps us reach our potential. Knowledge allows us to be more understanding of others. There have been many times as I look at my test score that I have to remind myself that there is so much more to life and school than a grade.
4. It has helped me have empathy. When people come to me feeling frustrated about school and feeling like they will never be good enough, I know how they feel. We all experience things differently, but I can understand, to some degree, where they are coming from. I get what it is like to feel hopeless. I get what it is like to feel like you'll never be smart enough. I get it. This is one of those things that it's just not very fun to talk about with someone who has school smarts. It just makes you feel even more dumb. It's good to talk with someone you love and respect but struggles as well. I know it helped me. 
5. I know where true knowledge comes from. Struggling with school has helped me realize that true knowledge comes from God. I believe that God cares about all aspects of our lives, but sometimes He allows us to not do as well as we would like because the lessons from "failing" are greater than the lessons from "succeeding." There have been times that the "failing", or not doing as well as I would like, have taught me significant lessons that have blessed my life and have changed me forever. I would take the things I have learned from those times over good grades every time. I realize that God has a plan for me. He knows the things I need to learn and He will allow me to experience the "failures" in order for me to learn the lessons I need. He is the source of true knowledge. This also helped me realize that whenever I was able to master a concept that this was from God. It wasn't because I'm so smart, but because He was blessing me. It's a lot easier to be humble, when you don't always get the grade you want. 

All of this being said, I don't think I am superior to people who have the gift of school smarts. I think it's great that some people are blessed with that and they learn these principles in other areas of their lives. We all have different gifts and struggles. I just realized, as I reflected on this struggle, that this is something I am grateful for. It changed my perspective from frustration to gratitude.