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| with sister e. |
Wowee.
This week has been nuts. I can't believe it's already over. We had almost no
time to proselyte this week because of transfers. We had to take everyone everywhere,
but it was fun.
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| with sister e and sister s. |
The
best part of this week was getting our new sister, Sister S. She’s Samoan, but
she was born and raised in Sydney. She's amazing. I've never met anyone with
such pure reasons for coming on a mission. She was a seminary teacher for three
years before she came out so she's already pro. She's also just delightful to
be around. Man, I love her!
We
also had MLC this week and it was great as always. But Sister E and I have
really struggled with finding and that's what the whole thing was on, which is
good cause that's what we needed. Although, I started to feel a bit bad about
the struggles we've had. All of these other missionaries were sharing these
miracles they've had with finding all the time and I started to fall into
Satan's trap of comparing, but I was doing ok. I just felt on the verge of
tears. Sometimes I'm much too emotional. I think I was also feeling a bit
overwhelmed with training a new missionary and not feeling like we had the kind
of area that would help her to learn and grow and be a model area for all the
sisters in our zone.
So we
went for a little break and Sister E told me that she was feeling the same way.
I thought I would be ok, but them some sisters sang "Nearer my God to
thee" and it was beautiful. Music always gets to me, so of course I
started crying. It was a bit embarrassing, but only my companion and one of my
good friends saw me so it was ok. I just felt bad that I was loosing it a bit.
We decided we should get blessing so we asked President if after we could get
blessings. He said of course and so we went into his office and chatted with
him for about 45 minutes. He asked
us what was up and then he really helped build us up. He was so loving. It was
just what I needed. I love President and Sister Lindsay. They are amazing. They
have really helped me feel loved and appreciated on my mission.
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| sister e and the ap's. |
Then
in the blessing I was told exactly what I needed to hear. One of the things I
have sometimes struggled with wanting to be like other missionaries in general.
I see that they have different gifts than me and I want that, but in the
blessing God told me that he has blessed me with many gifts and that I should
be grateful for that and not wish for others gifts. That was a good reminder
for me. God has blessed me with so much.
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| district last transfer. |
I have
felt better since then, but for some reason there is a bit of lingering aching.
Sunday was just what I needed. I felt very blessed. We had no investigators
there because one dropped us and one didn't show up so that was a bit
frustrating, but church was great for me.
We
also had a miracle! We hadn't found any new investigators this week and we had
zero time to proselyte on Sunday but the Elders found us a new investigator and
the sisters found us one as well! God is so good to us!
We
also sang in a fireside. We thought it was at Warwick chapel (the furthest
south in our zone) so we went there and were practicing. (We were supposed to
be the prelude.) Then it was 10 minutes to 7 and no one was there. We called
the ZL and they told us it was at the Meriwa chapel (the farthest north in our
zone.) So we left straight away and headed up there, but on the way we had to
go through slow traffic because they were doing drug testing. We got there a
half an hour late. It ended up being fine and we just did the closing song. At
first I felt tempted to feel stressed, but then I just laughed. It was pretty
funny how it all worked out and the members were really kind about it. Good
times.
Monday because it was a public holiday p day was changed to today. We had zone
meeting in the morning and it was really good. I was just feeling a bit less
patient and loving all morning. Then I was feeling bad that I felt bad. During
the closing song I just started crying... it was so embarrassing. I didn't just
cry a little like I did in MLC. I was actually crying kind of hard. AND we were
all sitting in a U shape so pretty much everyone could see me. I tried to hide
it pretty well, but I think most people saw. I felt so bad. I'm supposed to be
the strong one. I'm supposed to be the leader that struggling missionaries can
turn to for strength. I'm not supposed to be the struggling one! (hence the PD2
quote as my subject, that's how I felt.) But it all turned out ok. I
was able to pull myself together again before we said goodbye to everyone. But
I was mostly just annoyed that I was crying over nothing. How dumb. But then I
realized that it was ok. I don't have to be perfect in front of everyone. I can
be me. I was having a hard day and that's ok. I think my body just needed to
cry. It was annoying, but it's ok. I think it's just one of those times where
I've got a bit more on my plate then I know exactly how to handle so I'm
handling things a little less gracefully as I would wish. But that's my goal
for the rest of this week. I'm going to be more patient and loving with
everyone.
Because
I was feeling a bit down I knew I needed to serve. The elders planned a zone p-day
that sounded a bit lame to me but I was trying to be supportive. They said they
weren't going to do lunch, but I wanted to serve so I offered to make lunch...
for the whole zone. ha But actually it's super easy. I'm making Salsa chicken
and I assigned each district a topping and I made two batches of Ann Hewlett's
cookies during my dinner last night for dessert. It ended up being really easy,
but I think it will be delicious and it gave me some thing that I could do it
serve. I think God knew I needed that.
I am
so thankful for this week. It was a lot of fun and I learned a lot. I really am
extremely happy most of the time. I tell you about my moments of weakness
because those are the times where I learn the most and progress. I'm so
thankful for them.
I've
realized this week how much I really have changed on my mission. I feel like
I'm such a different person, in a good way. I'm still me, but a better version
of me. I love my mission. I love the things it's doing for me. I loved in my
Book of Mormon reading this morning in 3 Nephi 22 when the Lord says that He
has only forsaken you for a small moment but that He will take care of you.
Then it goes on to say that it's for your children's benefit. I have felt that
acutely on my mission. I'm not only doing this for me and the people in Perth,
but for my future children as well. That makes it even more worth it. The times
that I can't do it for myself, I can do it for them.
I
don't want you to get me wrong. I am sooo happy. This is one of my favorite
areas and I'm with two of my favorite companions, my emotions just don't handle
the adjustment as well as my brain does haha.
I love
you all. I am so appreciative for the family that I have. I wouldn't trade you
for anyone else. I love you and am so thankful for your love and support.
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